Memories of Dad.

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 August 2001 at Palmilla

My dad passed away a little more than seven years ago {holy smokes, how could it be that long?! }. He was is by far the most influential person in my life. His patience and graciousness were surpassed only by his compassion and empathy. 

He was everything I want to be as a parent. 

Loving. 

Patient. 

Kind. 

Encouraging. 

Not a single day goes by that I don't think about him. Not a day without missing him. Without wishing he was by my side at Little Miss Thang's first violin recital. Or that I could call him when I'm angry or scared or need a shoulder to cry on. Not a single day. But it is no longer a painful thought every day. Just a longing. Sometimes a feeling. Or occasionally a look on Boy Genius' face that reminds me. And makes me smile. 

A few months ago I was cleaning out my email files when I ran across a folder called "Random Archive." Random, indeed. But it was an absolute treasure trove. 

Inside that file was possibly a hundred emails my dad sent to me years and years ago. It was such a joy to read them all again. 

I laughed. 

I cried. 

But mostly, I was thankful. Thankful for emails. Thankful that little bits and pieces of him, of his constant support, are still with me for whenever I need them. 

Most were encouraging quotes. I can remember what an impact his words had when I received the emails years ago. When I was dealing with the problem or disappointment du jour. Some were ten years old. Some from only months before his death. Each one memorable and filled with his idiosyncratic wit:

Sorrow looks back, worry looks around, faith looks ahead.

There are very few people who don’t become more interesting when they stop talking.

Before you can win you have to believe you are worthy.

Never fear shadows; they simply mean there is a light shining somewhere nearby.

I feel as though I’m diagonally parked in  a parallel universe.

You can’t expect a person to see eye to eye with you when you are looking down at them.

The best thing to do behind a persons back: pat it. 

A narrow mind and a wide mouth usually go together.

Personality has the power to open doors, but it takes character to keep them open.

Opportunity doesn’t knock, it whispers.

Never confuse a single defeat with a final defeat.

And the one that took my breath away:

They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them, but an entire life to forget them. 

Love, Daddy

Yes it does.

Of course, I never want to forget.

And I won't.

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